Did you hear the one about...

Dangerous bread


The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread. This is one of the annoying facts about bread.

But did you know that bread is actually dangerous? Here are seven facts that prove this:

  1. More than 98% of convicted felons in France are bread eaters.
  2. More than 90% of violent crimes in the US are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
  3. Half of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households in Scotland, score below average on standardized tests.
  4. In 18th century Europe, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years, infant mortality rates were unacceptably high, many women died in childbirth, and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever and influenza ravaged whole nations.
  5. Bread is made from a substance called 'dough'. It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average person eats more bread than that in one month!
  6. Just one small loaf of bread, if frozen and dropped from a tall building, could kill a passer-by instantly.
  7. Most bread eaters are unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling. We trust you are not one of those!

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