Did you hear the one about...

Mr President


The following story may, or may not, be true.

The president is being driven back to the White House in his limousine. Feeling chatty, he leans forward to the chauffeur and asks, "Tell me Bob; is this car expensive?"

"Of course, Mr President," replies the driver, "this car is the most expensive car in the world. It has all the latest technological gizmos, the most luxurious suspension and upholstery, and the highest specification of security that money can buy."

"And can it go fast?" asks the president.

"Of course, Mr President," replies the driver, "this car is designed to be driven faster than any other car on the road. If a terrorist was chasing us, we would have no difficulty in out-pacing him."

"And is it easy to drive?" asks the president.

"Of course, Mr President," replies the driver, "this car's sophisticated computerised driving system means that even a MORON could drive it."

"Then in THAT case, could I take the wheel for a while?" asks the president.

Now the driver knows that the president is OK driving a golf buggy or a mini-tractor on the farm, but he had never actually passed a driving test.

Nevertheless, he is the most powerful man of the most powerful country in the world, so he says "Of course, Mr President." He pulls over, the president settles behind the wheel and the chauffeur gets in the back.

"Now then, how does this thing work..." mumbles the president. Fiddling about with the gear lever and pedals, the car suddenly lurches forward and within seconds, the limo is speeding down the highway at 95 miles an hour. Pretty soon, a police patrol car's siren is heard, lights flash, and the chauffeur pleads with the president to stop.

The president manages to stop, the police officer approaches and taps on the window. But when he sees who's driving, he says "Just a moment please Mr President, I need to radio the station." and scurries back to his patrol car. "Sergeant," he says, trembling, "I've just pulled over REALLY important person and I need to know what to do!"

The sergeant replies "I don't care who you've pulled over; if he's breaking the law, book him. Who is it anyway? The mayor?" The officer says, "No, he's more important than that."

"You mean it's the Governor again?" "No, even more important." replies the officer.

"Well who on earth is it!" shouts the sergeant.

"No idea," says the officer, "but he's got the president as a driver!"


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